The lessons of buying a new car...

I bought a new car, recently, well, it was a few months ago now.  Nothing was really wrong with my old car, maybe it was a little banged up and dirty but it still ran good and got me where I needed to go without any problems at all...and I loved it, still.  However, I still felt, for some reason, that I wanted a new car and that I should have 2 cars in case I needed a backup.  I even knew what kind I wanted!  I had a Buick LeSabre Custom and wanted a Buick Enclave.  It was bigger, so I could carry more people with me; and it had all wheel drive so I could travel better in all kinds of weather, especially snow and dangerous weather like that, and it was a Buick, which based on my previous car I knew I trusted.

As with any new decision, there were other things to consider.  Things I thought were pretty important; things like another payment on top of my house payment, not getting as many miles per gallon as my car, the extra cost of buying new 19 inch wheels when the time came, having 2 cars on the insurance payments, having 2 cars, period, when I was only one person.  I thought these things were so important, in fact, that I decided to either wait until I really needed a new car, maybe a year or two down the road, or try and talk myself into a different car that had the same seating and maybe a better miles per gallon number.  I tried, I really did, to look at other vehicles, but I hated all of them, they were not for me; even though they even looked EXACTLY like the one I wanted, the Buick Enclave, I did not even want to consider them in my heart.  So I decided to not get anything and just stay with my trusted Buick LeSabre, which was good, nothing wrong with it, remember.

Well, as is sometimes the case, you're not really as in control of things as you think you are.  A Buick Enclave jumped itself into my path, when I least expected it!  I was out of town, even out of state!, visiting and helping a friend. Getting a new car was nowhere on my radar because, like I said, I  had decided not to get a new one yet.  When my friend's son slid onto some ice and ran into the car in front of him, we rushed over to his place of work to check on him and make sure he was alright.  Yes, he had gone straight to work after the accident!  As we saw he was, by the grace of God, alright, I realized he worked at a Buick car dealership.  Although, it, in retrospect, wasn't the time, I asked my friend to drive around the lot, curious as to whether there were any Buick Enclaves to be found.  Lo and behold, (were you seriously surprised???) there was one Buick Enclave, all in it's dark brown glory.  It was on sale for Christmas.  It had a bench seat in the middle instead of the undesirable (at least to me, hey I needed an 8 seater vehicle!) 2 bucket seats I had seen Buick Enclaves as having on the internet.  It seemed meant to be, or was it?

So I decided to put forth a test of faith, I said, 'Well, I'll see if my bank approves a loan and if they do and it all works out, maybe I was meant to get this Enclave!'  The bank approved me immediately.

So I said, "Well, if the paperwork can get here in time, before the sale goes off etc. etc. etc. it might be meant to be for me to buy this vehicle."  The paperwork arrived in time.

Before the paperwork arrived and before the next business day at the dealership, because of the weekend, I had a couple days to wrack my brain with decisionmaking and indecisionmaking, as I like to call it, because I can never make up my mind, even if I feel it's what I should do, or what I really, really want to do!  I made up a projected budget.  I asked the advice of family and friends.  I prayed fervently for an answer.  I read reviews on the internet.  I checked values on the internet.  I 'slept on it.'

Sometimes, I think, people get a little agitated and iritated with my indecision.  I guess making decisions isn't as anguishing for others as it is for me.  I get ideas through anguishing over my indecision though; from what others say, from what I reason out in my own mind and from playing around with different scenarios as I anguish.  I got lots of good advice and one that really stuck with me was when my friend turns to me and says "Do you really think you're going to be better prepared a year from now to get a new car, than you already are?  What's going to change?  You're still going to have a house payment, you're still going to have savings, you're still going to have a job.  Why not just get it now?"  Well, she might have said it a little differently but that's how it came to my mind and my remembrance.  After that, I came up with another 'if/then' plan!

I said, 'Okay, I'll leave it up to the dealership.  I will offer a certain price to them and tell them that's all I can do.  If they can take it, I will take the car.  If they couldn't then that would be that!" ... They accepted my offer.

Hmmm, are things LOOKING A LITTLE FISHY TO YOU YET???

I texted my mom that I guessed I was going to buy the new car.  Guess what she wrote to me?

"I knew you would...."

Why didn't I know it?  Or, you know what?  I guess I did know it too, how could I ignore the signs?  Why do I let myself get caught up in fear of the unknown, when everything usually works out for the best?

And remember all my fears?  They all got checked off one by one.

I bought the Enclave and loved it, never had any after the fact feelings of remorse.  It felt right from the second I made my decision to buy it.  I would have been disappointed if I hadn't of bought it, actually.  Would have kicked myself all the way home!

What about all the things that I had thought were pretty important?

1.  The payment turned out to be $500 a month.  I added up all my previous month's purchases, putting them into categories of needs and frivolities and guess what it boiled down to?  Oh, wow, I'd have to stop going to Wal-Mart and wasting my money on stupid stuff, big deal!  That's what I always wanted anyway!

2.  What about having to pay two car insurance payments?  Well, when I went to the insurance company, guess what?  It only added about $100 to my previous policy!  No big deal there, plus I wouldn't have to pay it for about 3 months!

 3.  What about having two cars for one person?  I live in Nevada, that's a given.  Lot's of people have more than one car and plus, it's safer to have a backup car in case your car doesn't start in the morning and you have to get to work and no one is available to help you etc. etc. etc.  So, no big deal, plus!  Plus, I actually let my friends son use my LeSabre since the vehicle he was using got put out of commission when he slid into that other vehicle, remember?  So I look at it this way...

When you make a change for the better in your life, there will always be prices to pay, but those prices are worth it!  You still have all the valuable lessons learned from what you knew up to that point and you are also able to grow and learn more after the change occurs.

The lesson is trying not to be too afraid to make the necessary changes just because you might not know the complete plan that is to come.  You have to have faith that you will gain so many more blessings (blessings you deserve!) and then use all you now have to even bless the lives of others (blessings they deserve!).

 Another lesson, is this.  If you feel like hesitating or putting off a decision, say for a year, ask yourself the question..."Will you really be any more ready in a year, than you are right now?"  Think about it.

And another lesson...I promise this is the last one...even though you may feel like you don't know the answer, you might just be kidding yourself and when you, in all innocence, come forward with what you think will be a big proclamation and surprise to those around you, don't be at all surprised when the first words out of all their mouths is "I knew you would!"

Faith

When the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified.  

"It is a spirit," they said, and cried out for fear.  

But Jesus immediately said to them:

"Take courage! It is I.  Do not be afraid."

"Lord, if it is you," Peter replied

"tell me to come to you on the water."

"Come," He said.

Then Peter got down out of the boat,

walked on the water and came toward Jesus.

Matthew 14: 26-29

When this scene is imagined between Peter and the Savior the soul is stirred at the great amount of faith that had been shown on the part of Peter.  He was so trusting in Jesus that he did step off from the safety of the boat into the great unknown and begin to walk upon the water.  Those first steps of faith often do come with fear of the unknown; there is elation, to be sure, but you would never be able to take those steps upon the water if you didn't have the faith that you would indeed be safe, and would not immediately crash through the waves and flounder in the deep and tumultuous waters.

A song I love lately, [Oceans by United] says:

You call me out upon the waters

The great unknown

Where feet may fail

And there I find You in the mystery

In oceans deep, My faith will stand

I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise my soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours and You are mine.

When Jesus calls you out 'upon the waters' it may feel like it is unknown territory. It may feel like if you do this thing, you might fail miserably.  Were you even worthy enough in the first place to be called out there into that 'great unknown'?  That is where faith comes in.  Worrying about the unknowns, the why's, the what if's will only cause you to falter and doubt all the things you knew to be true.  The next line shows that Jesus is there to help us 'in the mystery and the oceans deep', that is where we will find Him waiting for us, to lead and guide us, to pick us up when we fall, to save us when we sink.  We just have to call upon His name, keep our eyes on Him, feel the safety of His everlasting embrace.  He knows us all and we are His.  We must also remember that He is ours, He would love nothing better than if we held Him closely at all times, when the 'oceans rise' and also when the seas are calm.  At all times.  If we realize this, then our faith will stand.  Our faith is centered on our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  If we remember that while exercising our faith, our feet will never fail.

Matthew goes on in verses 30 and 31:

But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and,

beginning to sink, cried out, 

"Lord, save me!"

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him.

"You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

The winds came up and caused Peter to lose his focus of keeping his eyes on Jesus, caused his faith to waver.  Just in an instant he faltered and began to sink.  He knew, however, that a Savior was right in reach and he cried out for the Lord to save him.  How I love the next word in the scripture!  Immediately!  It says "Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him."  What a feeling of great love!  He will never let us flounder in our iniquities, all we need to do is call upon His name and he will immediately reach out for us and save us with His great love for us, he does not want even one of us to remain lost, he wants to save us, every last one.  The last sentence of the scripture places an emphasis on faith, or lack thereof.  When your faith shrinks, doubts come flooding in.  Strength lies in realizing that your faith is failing and immediately taking the steps necessary to fortify your faith once again, and that means focusing on and believing in our Savior, Jesus Christ and the promises He has made us, and also remembering the truths he has made known to us through the Holy Spirit.  

The song "Oceans" continues:

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand

Will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You've never failed and You won't start now.

The grace of our Savior finds us no matter how deep we sink into the deepest waters. His hand will always reach for us, to lead and guide us, to ultimately save us.  Of our own accord, we cannot rise. We can do nothing and are nothing without our Savior.  We may even become paralyzed with fear.  That is when the Savior reaches for us, all we have to do is call to Him and ask for Him to save us.  He will strengthen us and be a shining beacon that we can grasp onto, gaze upon and follow out of the darkness, and as we rise we will inevitably be increasing our faith--helping it to become unshakable faith more and more.  As our faith is tried we must hold onto that faith, and never let go.  Faith has been an underlying lesson all throughout this week.  Here is a quote I found as I was studying the scriptures this week that further emphasizes this point:

Trials of faith do not always come in the form of adversity.  Elder Richard G. Scott...taught that sometimes "the trial of [our] faith" is simply a matter of exercising our faith: "You can learn to use faith more effectively by applying this principle taught by Moroni: 'Faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith' [Ether 12:6]  Thus, every time you try your faith--that is, act in worthiness on an impression-- you will receive the confirming evidence of the Spirit.  Those feelings will fortify your faith.  As you repeat that pattern, your faith will become stronger.

 Taking those first few steps of faith, just as Peter did to walk on the water toward Jesus, is sometimes pretty easy.  It's when the winds (aka trials) come that we are really forced to exercise our faith.  That point where the known stops and the unknown begins.  We've all heard the term 'blind faith.'   That is knowing you have been led along a certain path for a reason, mustering the courage to continue on even though you might not know exactly where the path will lead, and having the faith to complete the journey and receive all the blessings that are sure to follow, if you will just continue on in that unfailing faith.  You have an active role to play in the fortifying of your faith.  You must try your faith and act upon any and all impressions and confirmations of the Spirit that you have received.  You can then remember your try's of faith as you repeat this process, allowing the strength of your faith to grow and take root.

Another quote I found this week is by Jeffrey R. Holland and speaks of this specific topic as well:

Preparatory faith is formed by experiences in the past--by the known, which provides a basis for belief.  But redemptive faith must often be exercised toward experiences in the future--the unknown, which provides an opportunity for the miraculous.  Exacting faith, mountain-moving faith, faith like that of the brother of Jared, precedes the miracle and the knowledge.  He had to believe before God spoke.  He had to act before the ability to complete that action was apparent.  He had to commit to the complete experience in advance of even the first segment of its realization.  Faith is to agree unconditionally--and in advance--to whatever conditions God may require in both the near and distant future.

Sometimes you already know the conditions God requires of you, but you somehow hesitate anyway, waiting for something to be revealed to you.  You must exercise faith, even in the unknown, in order to reap the benefits or see the miracles that are sure to follow your acts of faith.  Peter said "If it is you, Lord, tell me to come."  He heard the voice of the Lord, even though he couldn't see Him and immediately hopped out of the boat to walk on water.  Can a man walk on water?  No.  Can a man with faith in Him who can walk on water, walk on water?  Apparently he can.  Can you?  Can I?  With the help of and faith in our Savior all things are possible.

The song, "Oceans" from Hillsong United ends like this:

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Wherever You would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

In the presence of my Savior!

Let my faith be made stronger!  Let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me!  Lead me to the presence of my Savior!

As I said, this week has been a lesson in faith after lesson in faith.  Everywhere I turned I found lessons on faith that spoke to my soul.  Here is another example I came across:

Through divine personal revelation, the Book of Mormon prophet Lehi and his son Nephi were each shown a vision of our mortal probationary state and its accompanying dangers.  Lehi says, "And it came to pass that there arose a mist of darkness, yea, even an exceedingly great mist of darkness, insomuch that they who had commenced in the path did lose their way, that they wandered off and were lost" (1 Nephi 8:23).  Yet, "he [also] saw other multitudes pressing forward; and they came and caught hold of the end of the rod of iron; and they did press their way forward, continually holding fast to [that] rod of iron, until they came forth and fell down and partook of the fruit of the tree," meaning the tree of life (1 Nephi 8:30). --Ann M. Dibb "Hold On" Oct. 2009.

And:

In Lehi's dream an already difficult journey gets more difficult when a mist of darkness arises, obscuring any view of the safe but narrow path his family and others are to follow.  It is imperative to note that this mist of darkness descends on all the travelers--the faithful and the determined ones (the elect, we might even say) as well as the weaker and ungrounded ones.  The principal point of the story is that the successful travelers resist all distractions, including the lure of the forbidden paths and jeering taunts from the vain and proud who have taken those paths.  The record says that the protected "did press their way forward, continually [and, I might add, tenaciously} holding fast" to a rod of iron that runs unfailingly along the course of the true path.  However dark the night or the day, the rod marks the way of that solitary, redeeming trail. --Jeffrey R. Holland "Safety for the Soul" Oct. 2009.

We must follow the word of God and will then be led to everlasting life, to live in the presence of our Savior. The path described in the dream was completely blotted out, no one could see.  But the metaphorical arm of the Savior was right there along the path the whole time.  The people had to exercise faith that they were not lost or forgotten, that a way would be provided for them to find their way to everlasting life, then they had to maintain that faith and never let go of the iron rod, no matter if the way was too hard, or too long or too lonely, in order to reach their goal of eternal life, they had to hold on and never let go until such a time that they would reach their destination and reap their blessings.

I write these things on faith more for myself than anyone else, because who reads this anyway?  When I feel my faith may begin to waver I can come back here and fortify my faith with my own testimonies and experiences...and a song!  Always a song. :)

I pray for all who read this to have enduring and unshakable faith, even to the end.
Amen